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LEPRECHAUN
* (1993, 91 minutes, Rated R)
They're always after his Lucky Charms.
Here's something no one ever talks about: There were the '80s, there were the '90s... but the
period from 1987 to 1993 doesn't fit into either decade. That chunk of time is like its own decade: A
time where glam rock became more glam than rock, everything vomited teal and fuchsia, and
smart-alec serial killers were all the rage. I may have pegged my jeans during that period. It wasn't
a good time.
Personally, I blame Poppy.
* (1993, 91 minutes, Rated R)
They're always after his Lucky Charms.
Here's something no one ever talks about: There were the '80s, there were the '90s... but the
period from 1987 to 1993 doesn't fit into either decade. That chunk of time is like its own decade: A
time where glam rock became more glam than rock, everything vomited teal and fuchsia, and
smart-alec serial killers were all the rage. I may have pegged my jeans during that period. It wasn't
a good time.
Personally, I blame Poppy.
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As I mentioned, horror movies had skewed to more of a horror-comedy route, with Sir Robert
Englund's Freddy Krueger leading the way. Some of these films were more scary than funny,
some more funny than scary. But what happens when a horror-comedy isn't scary or funny?
You get the movie Leprechaun.
Englund's Freddy Krueger leading the way. Some of these films were more scary than funny,
some more funny than scary. But what happens when a horror-comedy isn't scary or funny?
You get the movie Leprechaun.
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| Former US President George H.W. Bush (a.k.a. "Poppy") was in office during our country's Color Me Badd years. I hold him responsible. |
| Leprechauns: Clearly the stuff of nightmares. |
There's a kernel of an intelligent movie buried in here. You know how the basic myth behind
leprechauns -- you catch one, and you get to take his pot of gold. This film takes the next logical
step with the leprechaun being pissed off about being essentially mugged.
And that's pretty much the case with the O'Gradys. Mr. O'Grady takes the Leprechaun's gold, and
the Leprechaun (famed Ewok Warwick Davis) with their program. Just before having a stroke,
O'Grady manages to trap the Leprechaun in a crate with a four-leaf clover. Yeah, apparently
four-leaf clovers are to leprechauns what crucifixes are to vampires. No, it doesn't make much
sense to me, either.
Ten years later, and Jennifer Aniston and her dad are moving from L.A. into the old O'Grady home.
This is early in Jennifer Aniston's career, long before she was famous for not being married to
Brad Pitt anymore.
leprechauns -- you catch one, and you get to take his pot of gold. This film takes the next logical
step with the leprechaun being pissed off about being essentially mugged.
And that's pretty much the case with the O'Gradys. Mr. O'Grady takes the Leprechaun's gold, and
the Leprechaun (famed Ewok Warwick Davis) with their program. Just before having a stroke,
O'Grady manages to trap the Leprechaun in a crate with a four-leaf clover. Yeah, apparently
four-leaf clovers are to leprechauns what crucifixes are to vampires. No, it doesn't make much
sense to me, either.
Ten years later, and Jennifer Aniston and her dad are moving from L.A. into the old O'Grady home.
This is early in Jennifer Aniston's career, long before she was famous for not being married to
Brad Pitt anymore.
Some of you kids might not know this, but there was a time
when Jennifer Aniston was famous for actual acting, in a
popular sitcom called "Friends." As Rachel Green, Jennifer
Aniston was funny and sexy and cute... until she was
saddled with a decade-long on-and-off relationship with the
intensely annoying Ross Geller (David Schwimmer).
Ross ruins everything. He's like the Poppy of sitcom
characters.
Or maybe Poppy is the Ross Gellar of US Presidents. Hard
to tell.
Anyway, Leprechaun was pre-"Friends," rendering the past
couple paragraphs irrelevant. But I'm gonna call Jennifer
Aniston's character "Rachel" anyway.
Rachel hates the O'Grady house, cuz there's, like, not a mall
anywhere in sight! That is, until she meets Hunky
McHandiman, who Dad has hired to help fix up the house.
Assisting Hunky McHandiman is the sweet simpleton Ozzy
when Jennifer Aniston was famous for actual acting, in a
popular sitcom called "Friends." As Rachel Green, Jennifer
Aniston was funny and sexy and cute... until she was
saddled with a decade-long on-and-off relationship with the
intensely annoying Ross Geller (David Schwimmer).
Ross ruins everything. He's like the Poppy of sitcom
characters.
Or maybe Poppy is the Ross Gellar of US Presidents. Hard
to tell.
Anyway, Leprechaun was pre-"Friends," rendering the past
couple paragraphs irrelevant. But I'm gonna call Jennifer
Aniston's character "Rachel" anyway.
Rachel hates the O'Grady house, cuz there's, like, not a mall
anywhere in sight! That is, until she meets Hunky
McHandiman, who Dad has hired to help fix up the house.
Assisting Hunky McHandiman is the sweet simpleton Ozzy
| This picture made her a little famous, too. |
and his sarcastic kid guardian, Alex. Ozzy lets the Leprechaun out. And then Ozzy and Alex find the
Leprechaun's gold. And then Ozzy eats one of the gold coins. Geez, I think all that was left for Ozzy
to do was pee on the Leprechaun's shoes.
The Leprechaun is not pleased, and he wants his gold back. All hell breaks loose, and by "all hell
breaks loose," I mean the Leprechaun... bites and scratches people. Yes, for a good chunk of the
Leprechaun's gold. And then Ozzy eats one of the gold coins. Geez, I think all that was left for Ozzy
to do was pee on the Leprechaun's shoes.
The Leprechaun is not pleased, and he wants his gold back. All hell breaks loose, and by "all hell
breaks loose," I mean the Leprechaun... bites and scratches people. Yes, for a good chunk of the
movie, the Leprechaun is as threatening as an
ill-tempered cat.
This lack of threat did lead to a scene where I did
laugh out loud: Hunky McHandiman is chasing
the Leprechaun and steps in a bear trap. As
Hunky writhes in pain, the Leprechaun saunters
over to taunt him. The Leprechaun is in
mid-taunt when Hunky grabs the Leprechaun by
the back of the head and starts beating the hell
out of him! And here comes Rachel and Ozzy
and Alex, and they're all stomping a mudhole in
the Leprechaun's ass! IT'S COMPLETE
PANDEMONIUM!
ill-tempered cat.
This lack of threat did lead to a scene where I did
laugh out loud: Hunky McHandiman is chasing
the Leprechaun and steps in a bear trap. As
Hunky writhes in pain, the Leprechaun saunters
over to taunt him. The Leprechaun is in
mid-taunt when Hunky grabs the Leprechaun by
the back of the head and starts beating the hell
out of him! And here comes Rachel and Ozzy
and Alex, and they're all stomping a mudhole in
the Leprechaun's ass! IT'S COMPLETE
PANDEMONIUM!
| The Leprechaun in this film was only slightly more dangerous than Elmore, Official Cat of the Bargain Bin Review. |
Sadly, the res of the film is merely weird. The Leprechaun rides around on a tricycle, and is later
pulled over for speeding in a go-kart. The Leprechaun has an unexplained OCD thing going
where he has to shine shoes. The Leprechaun kills a guy by pogo-sticking him to death.
The Leprechaun has the ability to teleport, throw his voice, do dead-on impersonations, move
things with his mind, and is apparently neigh-invulnerable. But he can't make me laugh. And
despite some decent gore, he couldn’t scare me either. Really, even the jump scares in this
movie utterly fail.
How could this ridiculous of a concept be such a disappointment on so many levels? Perhaps
they should have had the Leprechaun fight the Easter Bunny.
pulled over for speeding in a go-kart. The Leprechaun has an unexplained OCD thing going
where he has to shine shoes. The Leprechaun kills a guy by pogo-sticking him to death.
The Leprechaun has the ability to teleport, throw his voice, do dead-on impersonations, move
things with his mind, and is apparently neigh-invulnerable. But he can't make me laugh. And
despite some decent gore, he couldn’t scare me either. Really, even the jump scares in this
movie utterly fail.
How could this ridiculous of a concept be such a disappointment on so many levels? Perhaps
they should have had the Leprechaun fight the Easter Bunny.
W Sometimes you want a strictly quantitative way to measure a film's entertainment value. I understand: numbers never lie. Though I'm not so sure about 17. I always thought 17 looks a little shifty... DEATHS BY LEPRECHAUN: 4 BITES / SCRATCHES BY LEPRECHAUN: 5 QUESTIONABLE EXCUSES TO INCLUDE CHEESECAKE PICS IN THIS REVIEW: 2 RANDOM DIGS AT A FORMER US PRESIDENT IN THIS REVIEW: 2 |
| LEPRECHAUN: KEY STATS A SPECIAL SIDE BAR BY NOLAHN |
Think Nolahn was being unfair
to this movie? Looking for a
second opinion? Then may we
recommend...
BADMOVIES.ORG
HELL HORROR
OBSCURE HORROR
INVASION OF THE B-MOVIES
Or you can check out where the
Leprechaun ranks in the Geeks
of Doom's 20 Scariest Horror
Movie Killers.
to this movie? Looking for a
second opinion? Then may we
recommend...
BADMOVIES.ORG
HELL HORROR
OBSCURE HORROR
INVASION OF THE B-MOVIES
Or you can check out where the
Leprechaun ranks in the Geeks
of Doom's 20 Scariest Horror
Movie Killers.