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DRACULA A.D. 1972
* * * (1972, 96 minutes, Rated PG)
That '70s Vampire Movie
I know what you’re thinking: A Dracula movie that’s rated PG? Welcome to the ’70s.
Don’t worry, this film hasn’t been defanged (har har) and would certainly get a PG-13 rating today.
Which is just as well. Based on my theater-going experience in recent years, if Dracula A.D. 1972
were released today with a PG rating, despite obviously including punctured jugulars,
decapitations and stakes through the heart, some people would still drag their six-year-olds to see
it.
Dracula A.D. 1972 is a Hammer Film Production and therefore “too good” for the Bargain Bin
Review. But “Hammer Films” is the topic for this B-Movie Meatloaf, so there we are. For the
uninitiated, Hammer is a British production company best-known for the heap of bad ass horror
movies it made in the ‘50s, ’60s and ‘70s. This is the second of three films to feature Peter “Grand
Moff Tarkin” Cushing as Van Helsing square off against Christopher “Saruman” Lee as Dracula.
Think of Cushing and Lee as the Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan of British horror films.
So why did I pick this one? Because with a title like Dracula A.D. 1972, you know it’s gonna be
groovy, baby.
* * * (1972, 96 minutes, Rated PG)
That '70s Vampire Movie
I know what you’re thinking: A Dracula movie that’s rated PG? Welcome to the ’70s.
Don’t worry, this film hasn’t been defanged (har har) and would certainly get a PG-13 rating today.
Which is just as well. Based on my theater-going experience in recent years, if Dracula A.D. 1972
were released today with a PG rating, despite obviously including punctured jugulars,
decapitations and stakes through the heart, some people would still drag their six-year-olds to see
it.
Dracula A.D. 1972 is a Hammer Film Production and therefore “too good” for the Bargain Bin
Review. But “Hammer Films” is the topic for this B-Movie Meatloaf, so there we are. For the
uninitiated, Hammer is a British production company best-known for the heap of bad ass horror
movies it made in the ‘50s, ’60s and ‘70s. This is the second of three films to feature Peter “Grand
Moff Tarkin” Cushing as Van Helsing square off against Christopher “Saruman” Lee as Dracula.
Think of Cushing and Lee as the Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan of British horror films.
So why did I pick this one? Because with a title like Dracula A.D. 1972, you know it’s gonna be
groovy, baby.
 |
The film actually kicks off in 1872, with Dracula (Lee) and Van Helsing (Cushing) duking it out on
top of a runaway carriage. And already this film is far cooler than anything that’s ever come from
the works of Anne Rice. The unmanned runaway carriage crashes -- as unmanned runaway
carriages are wont to do -- seriously injuring Van Helsing and impaling Dracula with a wooden
wagon wheel.
I’ll state that again: Dracula gets impaled with a wooden wagon wheel.
top of a runaway carriage. And already this film is far cooler than anything that’s ever come from
the works of Anne Rice. The unmanned runaway carriage crashes -- as unmanned runaway
carriages are wont to do -- seriously injuring Van Helsing and impaling Dracula with a wooden
wagon wheel.
I’ll state that again: Dracula gets impaled with a wooden wagon wheel.
| Ready for some vampire mojo? |
Bad. Ass. Then Van Helsing, showing
that he’s not a kindly Santa Claus kind of
senior citizen, stumbles over to Dracula so
he can twist it in and break it off.
Both die. The end.
Okay, not quite. A mutton-chopped lad
shows up to collect Dracula’s ashes and
pinkie ring, which he hides just outside the
cemetery where Van Helsing is being laid
to rest. Just as you’re wondering if that will
be important later, we’re off to… THE
PRESENT DAY (if by “Present Day” you
mean the 1970s London)!
that he’s not a kindly Santa Claus kind of
senior citizen, stumbles over to Dracula so
he can twist it in and break it off.
Both die. The end.
Okay, not quite. A mutton-chopped lad
shows up to collect Dracula’s ashes and
pinkie ring, which he hides just outside the
cemetery where Van Helsing is being laid
to rest. Just as you’re wondering if that will
be important later, we’re off to… THE
PRESENT DAY (if by “Present Day” you
mean the 1970s London)!
| Ouch. |
Industry! Progress! Hot pants! After grooving through the credits, we find a swinging party in
progress as a gang of too-cool hipsters crash a posh pad and rock out. Until the fuzz shows up.
Leave it to The Man to ruin a good time.
One of the hipsters, the less-than-subtly named Johnny Alucard (Christopher Neame, who also
plays Kid Mutton-Chop in the opening), is tired of the cops always killing his buzz and suggests a
whole new scene: The Black Arts! Yay! The rest of the gang -- including Jessica Van Helsing
(Stephanie Beacham), granddaughter of the grandson of the Van Helsing from the opening -- is
on board, though only for “a giggle.”
progress as a gang of too-cool hipsters crash a posh pad and rock out. Until the fuzz shows up.
Leave it to The Man to ruin a good time.
One of the hipsters, the less-than-subtly named Johnny Alucard (Christopher Neame, who also
plays Kid Mutton-Chop in the opening), is tired of the cops always killing his buzz and suggests a
whole new scene: The Black Arts! Yay! The rest of the gang -- including Jessica Van Helsing
(Stephanie Beacham), granddaughter of the grandson of the Van Helsing from the opening -- is
on board, though only for “a giggle.”
| Would it be inappropriate for me to mention Ms. Beacham's gravity-defying rack? Oh. Never mind. |
Obviously, Johnny Alucard has an ulterior
motive. I won’t give it away, but let’s just
say Johnny already has a bunch of satanic
paraphernalia, his own spooky music and
Dracula’s remains. Yes, even the pinkie
ring.
Before you know it, Dracula is feeding on
smashing birds while Jessica witnesses
it all in her dreams, and Gramps Van
Helsing (Cushing again) is spending a lot
of time chain-smoking in his study and
lamenting the fact that he should be
motive. I won’t give it away, but let’s just
say Johnny already has a bunch of satanic
paraphernalia, his own spooky music and
Dracula’s remains. Yes, even the pinkie
ring.
Before you know it, Dracula is feeding on
smashing birds while Jessica witnesses
it all in her dreams, and Gramps Van
Helsing (Cushing again) is spending a lot
of time chain-smoking in his study and
lamenting the fact that he should be
fighting incontinence, not vampires. Unfortunately for him, Dracula wants more than to drink
blood, experience free love and do The Hustle -- he’s out to destroy the entire House of Van
Helsing, and it all leads up to a Rumble in the Urban Jungle between the two.
Groovy.
I can’t say much about this film compared to other Hammer Horror works, but on its own, Dracula
A.D. 1972 is good cheesy fun. The funky music, the so-cool lingo and the counterculture attitude
all run side-by-side with the usual vampire goodness. Speaking of the usual vampire goodness,
blood, experience free love and do The Hustle -- he’s out to destroy the entire House of Van
Helsing, and it all leads up to a Rumble in the Urban Jungle between the two.
Groovy.
I can’t say much about this film compared to other Hammer Horror works, but on its own, Dracula
A.D. 1972 is good cheesy fun. The funky music, the so-cool lingo and the counterculture attitude
all run side-by-side with the usual vampire goodness. Speaking of the usual vampire goodness,
| Sorry, Bela, but Christopher Lee drinks your milkshake. |
having played the Man of Science nearly 20 times prior to this
movie, Peter Cushing can be an awesome Van Helsing in his
sleep. And what can I say about Christopher Lee as Dracula? Even
with little to do here, I can’t think of another actor who so thoroughly
embodies the power, sexuality, nobility and savageness of Count
Dracula.
So while Dracula A.D. 1972 might be a weak entry among the other
vampire films in the Hammer Horror family, it’s still a good vampire
movie. You know, with vampires that actually consume human
blood and are too busy being unquestionably evil to act like a whiny
little emo baby with bed-head hair. REAL vampires.
That’s right, I’m looking at you, Twilight series. You think
Christopher Lee would do any of that sparkly crap? HELL NO.
Lee's Dracula doesn’t even speak in one of the Hammer Films
because he refused to speak the dialogue in the script. So guess
what? Christopher Lee drinks your milkshake, too.
movie, Peter Cushing can be an awesome Van Helsing in his
sleep. And what can I say about Christopher Lee as Dracula? Even
with little to do here, I can’t think of another actor who so thoroughly
embodies the power, sexuality, nobility and savageness of Count
Dracula.
So while Dracula A.D. 1972 might be a weak entry among the other
vampire films in the Hammer Horror family, it’s still a good vampire
movie. You know, with vampires that actually consume human
blood and are too busy being unquestionably evil to act like a whiny
little emo baby with bed-head hair. REAL vampires.
That’s right, I’m looking at you, Twilight series. You think
Christopher Lee would do any of that sparkly crap? HELL NO.
Lee's Dracula doesn’t even speak in one of the Hammer Films
because he refused to speak the dialogue in the script. So guess
what? Christopher Lee drinks your milkshake, too.
This review is Nolahn's entry into Strictly
Splatter's B-Movie Meatloaf, where like-minded
reviewers take on a common theme every other
month.
If you enjoyed this review (as if there was any
doubt), then check out the reviews of these
Hammer films by our fellow Meatloafians:
THE CURSE OF FRANKENSTEIN, reviewed by
Radiation Cinema
CAPTAIN CLEGG, reviewed by Obscure Horror
BLOOD FROM THE MUMMY'S TOMB, reviewed by
filmmaker Chris Watson
THE BRIDES OF DRACULA, reviewed by Jorge at
Strictly Splatter
HORROR OF DRACULA, reviewed by Jose at
Strictly Splatter
Splatter's B-Movie Meatloaf, where like-minded
reviewers take on a common theme every other
month.
If you enjoyed this review (as if there was any
doubt), then check out the reviews of these
Hammer films by our fellow Meatloafians:
THE CURSE OF FRANKENSTEIN, reviewed by
Radiation Cinema
CAPTAIN CLEGG, reviewed by Obscure Horror
BLOOD FROM THE MUMMY'S TOMB, reviewed by
filmmaker Chris Watson
THE BRIDES OF DRACULA, reviewed by Jorge at
Strictly Splatter
HORROR OF DRACULA, reviewed by Jose at
Strictly Splatter
| Official entry into the B-Movie Meatloaf! |
| '10 Binnie Winner! |