February
6
2012

Curing Your Case of the Mondays

aaa_CureMondays With something for everyone.  If you’re like me, you don’t need a cure for your Case of the Mondays today because you’re still basking in the glow of the Giants’ Super Bowl victory!

[Nolahn spends the next couple minutes whooping and hollaring as if he personally aided the New York Giants win the championship last night. He did not.]

How can anyone be having a bad day today? Well, I guess the Patriot fans are. Fair enough — I actually like the Patriots, and a small part of me would rather see the Giants prevail over some bland team no one could ever get worked up over, like the Jacksonville Jaguars. I mean, do the Jags even have fans? Are they even a real team? I’m not entirely sure.

I could always check at These Fries Are Good, where they recently redesigned NFL logos to be more honest (thanks to Joe Donatelli’s The Humor Columnist for the link). Besides, if there’s anything Giants and Patriots fans can agree on, it’s that the New York Jets are annoying.

NY-alltalk

Check out the whole collection over at These Fries Are Good. Also: Shut up, Rex Ryan.

But let’s say you’re not a football enthusiast. Let’s say you came here looking for movie-related stuff to escape all the Super Bowl talk in your office and all you’re finding today is blah-blah-blah-football and ENOUGH ALREADY.

I have something for you, too. Here is a montage of people flipping the bird for you to use as you see fit.

 

And finally, let’s say you just want a gentle laugh. I’ve got you covered with some pictures of cats breading:

catbreading

 

A little something for everyone on this super Monday morning.

February
5
2012

Saturday Night Video (on Sunday)

Creepiest?  If you’re like me, your mind isn’t on bad movies — or even movies — right now. It’s on the Super Bowl. Which reminds me: Happy holiday!

I can’t think of many movies that might eclipse seeing the glorious G-Men in the Super Bowl. Fortunately (?), this week I’ve picked out a film that couldn’t eclipse much of anything.

February
4
2012

Just in Time for the Super Bowl

USflag ”We’re not here to start no trouble.” Friends, how many times has this happened to you: You’re going to a friend’s house to celebrate one of our country’s finest holidays, the Super Bowl. But the thing is, you don’t care about the Super Bowl.

In fact, you’re filled with such questions as “Aren’t the Giants a baseball team?” and “Why is the ball shaped like that?” and “How can the commentators keep saying ‘tight end’ without snickering?”

Here’s a question for you: Why do you hate America?

Fortunately for you, comrade, I have something that will help you enjoy the Super Bowl just as much as your red-blooded American friends who will be all hopped up on beer and French onion dip.

Behold!

SUPER BOWL BINGO (XLVI Edition)

Now you too can follow along with the action, keeping an eye out for such guarnteed cliche moments both in and out of the game!

During the game, you can mark off your card when a commentator shouts “It’s a blitz!” (often done when it is, in fact, not a blitz) or when we cut away to one of the coaches, standing on the sidelines looking cranky.

And during those much ballyhooed commercial breaks, you can mark off your card when you see yet another overblown Pepsi ad or a trailer for yet another superhero movie.

Print and cut out the four game cards below. It’s fun for the whole family!

SBBingo1

SBBingo2SBBingo3SBBingo4

Enjoy! And, of course, GO GIANTS!

 

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February
3
2012

Flashback Friday

Print ”It just doesn’t matter! It just doesn’t matter!”  Happy Friday to you all. I’m sure you’re all feeling a bit foggy, a bit rough around the edges after your all-night Groundhog Day celebrations. Can’t say I blame you.

Thinking about Groundhog Day and Groundhog Day yesterday got me thinking about other Bill Murray gems that would be appropriate to feature in our Flashback Friday.  For as much of a following as Mr. Murray has these days, he certainly has a number of films that would fly here.

I very nearly settled on 1991’s What About Bob?,  a playful Frank Oz gem about the relationship between Bill Murray’s family-friendly version of Jack Nicholson in As Good As It Gets and douchey Richard Dreyfus as his douchey psychologist. What is it about Richard Dreyfus that makes me want to throw a shoe at him? He’s a fine actor, he’s never done anything to me and  I know almost nothing about him personally, and yet, every time I see him on the screen, I want someone to pie-face him. Strange… Anyway, the film gets great mileage out of my natural distaste of Richard Dreyfus, and may be the only film on Bill Murray’s resume where his portrayal reaches Tom Hanks-levels of sweetness.

I also considered 1997’s The Man Who Knew Too Little, because it’s funnier than I think many people give it credit for. Okay, it’s not a must-see Murray film, but one I think we could all agree is “mostly harmless.”

Ultimately, I’ve opted to go deep and present (remind?) you of Bill Murray’s first starring role. Hope you’re ready for some summer, cuz we’re heading into one of the great, ignored film genres: the summer camp film.

February
2
2012

Day of the Groundhog

groundhogI’ve got you, babe.  As I’m sure you’ve heard from every elementary school child, morning d.j. and local newscaster this morning, it’s Groundhog Day.

[Cue your favorite line from the Bill Murray film]

If you’re looking for some really fantastic Groundhog Day stuff, then I highly recommend you check out The Tobolowsky Files Ep. 29 – The Classic.

A top-shelf podcast, The Tobolowsky Files consists of stories about “life, love and the entertainment industry, as told by legendary character actor Stephen Tobolowsky,” whom you’ll all recognize as Ned! Ned Ryerson! from Groundhog Day.

Not sure why Mr. Tobolowsky waited 28 episodes to talk about his most recognizable role, but there ya go.

If you’re looking for some more traditional Groundhog Day activities, or weren’t able to make it down to Punxsutawney this morning (not to spoil it for you, but boo), then you could always make your own Groundhog Day with this handy, dandy DIY video:

February
1
2012

Review: Picasso Trigger

Fist pump!  It’s time again for the B-Movie Meatloaf, and for our latest experiment, we’re diving into the seedy, cheesy world of Andy Sidaris films.

For those of you not familar with the works of Andy Sidaris, I’ve come to think of him as the natural, R-rated extension of “Charlie’s Angels.” But with a less coherent story.

 

picasso-trigger-poster

*** (1988, 99 minutes, Rated R) Less than the sum of its parts

FRIDAY is a travel day, which means we’re subjected to some “mile high club” banter that’s too lame to repeat here. Also, Taryn makes a pit stop to “putter around” with a golfer in a hot tub. Predictably, this has absolutely no bearing  on the story.

GET THE FULL SKIVVY OVER AT THE BARGAIN BIN REVIEW

 

And don’t forget: Polls are still open for the 2012 Binnie Awards!

 

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January
31
2012

Curing Your Case of the Mondays

aaa_CureMondays  A New New Hope. Yes, I know it’s Tuesday. I was sick yesterday — though I admit I don’t have a note from the doctor excusing me from The Internet.

Still, today might very well feel like Monday Part II for you, and if that’s the case, you’re in luck because this might be the BIGGEST Cure for Your Case of the Mondays ever.

In 2009, developer Casey Pugh challenged The Internet to remake the original Star Warsas a fan film in 15-second snippets. What follows is a loving tribute to the film, filled with stop-motion animation, people’s rec rooms, and lots of gold foil.

Here is Star Wars Uncut: The Director’s Cut:

January
28
2012

Saturday Night Video

Now That’s What I Call Art ‘88!  It wasn’t until fairly recently that I first heard about Andy Sidaris. And now, I can’t imagine any b-movie site worth its teeth notcovering the works of Mr. Sidaris.

Everything you need to know about this week’s featured film is in the choice of voice-over guy in this trailer…

January
27
2012

Flashback Friday

PrintOf Mice and Catmen. There are few certainties in this world: Taxes, untimely gassiness, death, and goofy movie adaptations of Stephen King stories.

And here’s one such bit of Stephen King goofiness for today’s Flashback Friday, Sleepwalkers. Like many Stephen King stories, this one starts off haunting and creepy, soon reveals itself to be a creative mix of mythologies and finally ends in the goofiest way possible.

Come to think of it, this might be a good film to review over at The ‘Bin…

You’ll be happy to know that this film ends — as most should — by revealing that the true hero of the story is a cat named Clovis.

Sorry, but no dogs are suplexed in this film.

(that bit of magic happens around 3:15 in this clip)


 

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January
26
2012

Binnie Special: Patron Saint of The ‘Bin Nominees

OscarAward_TeaseA closer look at these characters.As you well know, voting is now open for the 4th Annual Binnie Awards. We even had the official Nomination Special the other day, hosted by our current Patron Saint of The ‘Bin, Tommy Wiseau.

After much (meaning “some,” meaning “an idea I had while having my morning constitution”) deliberation, we’ve decided to take a special look at some of the categories in this year’s ceremony.

Today, we’re going to take a special look at the nominees for 2012 Patron Saint of The ‘Bin. Because there is a chance you might live under a rock and not know everything there is to know about these fine individuals.

Here are the nominees…

The case for BRUCE CAMPBELL
  • Cult film icon
  • Exudes machismo
  • Wrote a book titled “Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way”
  • Was clearly born to play Elvis Presley (and has done so?)

 

The case for the buzzard puppet in THE GIANT CLAW 
  • Iconic b-movie monster
  • Looks like an abused Muppet
  • Defines “unintentionally hilarious”
  • Actual appearance was kept a mystery to the actors during filming, most likely to keep the actors from walking off the project
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    The case for JIM KELLY
  • Martial arts icon
  • Scene-stealer in Bruce Lee’s Enter the Dragon
  • Has the best “Kiai!” in all martial arts
  • Had a fantastic afro
  •  

    The case for “ROWDY” RODDY PIPER
    • Pro wrestling icon
    • Is actually a Golden Glove boxer and has a black belt in judo
    • Considered one of the best “heels” of all time, and was Hulk Hogan’s main antagonist throughout the ‘80s
    • Has come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass… and he’s all out of bubblegum

     

    The case for WENG WENG
  • B-movie icon
  • At 2’9” is listed in the Guinness World Records as the shortest adult actor in a leading role
  • Was so popular, he was honored by Imelda Marcos and made an honorary Philippine Secret Agent
  • Is “petite, like a potato”
  •  

    And lookie here: A third opportunity to vote for the 2012 Patron Saint of The ‘Bin!


     

    Polls will remain open through February 17th.

     

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